Smoke
(cough, cough,)
Smoke, smoke
Smoke…
Light up, inhale,
(cough, cough, choke choke)
Smoke

Oh.
Such a fuss lately about smoke!
Statistics now say Tobacco can kill you
Duh! What a joke!
People have been dying, getting cancer
In lungs, on lips, in throats,
Since tobacco growing was a slave industry
Meanwhile the Cigarette Companies have calmed our fears and doubts
With clever commercials showing what smoking is really about
SEX---
Always a winning strategy… I’m holding fire!
I’m a dragon! I’m a cowboy! I’m a vixen! Hey, look at me!
Billboards, magazines, movie stars all filling our heads with images of
‘The Smoking Sex Kitten’ and ‘The Stud’
Who knew the more you smoked the more of a dud you were in bed?
(It chokes the little capillaries, not with blood, but with tar instead)
Making both men and women less interested in sex
And eventually you can't keep it up -
(no lift, if you get my drift)

Butt … bonus!
Smoking has sparked a whole new billion dollar industry....
Patches and pills and chewing gum to try to quit
Because cold turkey is tough and willpower is often not enough...No shit!
Seems there's lots of money to be made out of addiction
I’m surprised old Nostradamus
Didn’t make some kind of doomsday prediction about it

Finally.....
The World Health Organization (More than 192 nations strong!) now says:

The International Will is to cut smoking and promote healthy living…

Well, way to go!
But, in response, did you know
The Tobacco Industry has spawned some interesting new selling strategies?
The new line they're giving is…“Okay fine, we’ll go along
“We know we are bad… in North America at least!”
And we don’t want to kill off people over here
So...We’ll concentrate on the East

Hence, They are running ads in foreign countries with
The Virgin Mary herself, praying over cigarettes
Holy smoke! The Virgin Mary! Talk about contrary...
No one would have guessed that one
I’ll think Jesus would turn right over in his grave (if he had one)
If he knew how pictures of his mother were being used these days…
Now that's really frigging Amazing, Grace

And Ad Representatives are meeting with Small World Big Shots
To convince them to do away with old age pensioners on the spot
In the most quick and convenient manner they’ve got---
Promote senior smoking today!
Statistics show they die off much quicker that way
Saving the government lots of money in benefits… hooray!

And clever Advertisers hire scantily clad young girls in Asia
To hand out cigarettes to children at Western style rock concerts…
Yeah, yeah, yeah! Kat-ching! Kat-ching!
The cash registers ring

Of course, most of the places this is happening
Westerners have never even heard of
Which is what the Tobacco Companies love
They’re hoping even if we do find out
No one will give a damn about it
Because anyway… That’s where all the Terrorists live, says Uncle Sam
Let’s hope they smoke a lot, as much as they can!

And meanwhile, ironically
There’s a growing movement here, to try to legalize Pot
Our government wants to adopt new laws and regulations
To make smoking dope more acceptable in our nation
“Okay…” says they, “we know marijuana can kill you too
Cause it’s still inhaled into lungs but it’s been proved
It’s no worse than numbing out with booze
It’s your poison!
Wreck your liver or your lungs
Now, you get to choose
We stand for equal opportunity
For those still living in the land of the mostly free

I guess
The World Health Organization making well intentioned resolutions
About smoking makes us all feel a little better
but I’m afraid it’s no real solution to societal ills
Because no patches or gum or pills
Are gonna cure all the things that are killing us these days

It’s all just smoke.